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Deathwatch... - Unbeliever's Land
...The continuing chronicles...
unbeliever64
unbeliever64
Deathwatch...
Angela's been beating me to the punch lately -- in stressful situations, I tend to seize up, while she tends to Get Highly Productive -- but to summarize, it looks like this is really it for Harold. He hasn't eaten or drunk anything for several days now, and he's getting weaker and weaker.

I am SO glad he's in hospice care now. Finally, nobody's racing him to the emergency room, or trying to stick IV's or other tubes in him. They're keeping him comfortable, and letting him go in peace.

I have no doubt the hospital could keep his body alive for years if they wanted to -- breathing for him, pushing liquid and nutrition into him... but that wasn't what he wanted.

Nobody's ever been readier to die than Harold. He's not leaving behind any "unfinished business". In the last six months, he's said goodbye to everyone -- army buddies, friends, relatives -- in person. He's never had a wife or children; there's no one who NEEDS him. His only real joy was calling his investment company every day, and seeing how much his net worth was that day. And since the stroke, he couldn't even do that...

*SIGH* I don't handle death well. At all. Ask anyone. And this time, even though it was clearly his wish -- he'd told everyone he knew, and even documented it legally -- the fact is, in order to ACCOMPLISH his wish, Angela and I have spent the last month fighting as hard as we could to prevent extreme measures from being taken. To LET him die.

This Harold experience is going to leave a scar...

A word to anyone who's considering leaving a "Physician's Directive" or other instructions stating you wish to die under certain circumstances: DON'T give your Power of Attorney to your primary beneficiary. Don't put someone in the position where they have to advocate for allowing you to die, all the while knowing that they will be the ones to most directly benefit from your demise.

It seriously sucks. Trust me...

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Current Emotional State: depressed depressed

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fair_witness From: fair_witness Date: May 11th, 2007 11:13 pm (UTC) (Link)
*hugs*

Y'all know how to reach us.
amaebi From: amaebi Date: May 12th, 2007 02:00 am (UTC) (Link)
Yeah, ouch. :(
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