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Goodbye, Bonnie... - Unbeliever's Land
...The continuing chronicles...
Goodbye, Bonnie...
BonnieDear god, this one hurts.

One of our very best and closest friends, Bonnie Jaron (previously Windish), collapsed and died in the shower this morning. It was most likely some sort of stroke/heart attack.

Her partner, Debbie Jaron, found her just a few minutes later, and frantically called 911, but there was nothing the paramedics could do.

Angela and I have known Bonnie for five and a half years -- she joined our secular group the meeting immediately following our wedding, and we quickly became good friends.

She lived conveniently nearby, and we always getting together to play cards and board games, and just to talk. She had moved here from Ohio, to pursue her doctorate in Counseling (which she JUST COMPLETED a few weeks ago!).

When Bonnie met Debbie, she knew that she had found the partner she had always dreamed of, and moved off to the suburbs of Portland to be with her. She adopted Debbie's children (from a previous marriage) as her own, and they became a full-fledged loving family.

If some asshole federal judge hadn't put a stay on Oregon's new domestic partnership law (that was supposed to go into effect on January 2), they would have been LEGALLY married by now (or whatever the hell euphemism the state was planning on using). As it is, they had gone through tons of legal crap to make sure they had all the rights over each other that they possibly could -- so HOPEFULLY Debbie won't have legal hassles on top of everything else she has to deal with.

But *STILL*. Motherfucking Christian Asshole judge better pray he's never in the same room with me...


Bonnie was one of the sweetest, kindest people we've ever known. And it's a cliche to say it, but she had a quirky sense of humor. As a counselor, she felt free to diagnose idiots on TV (or in real life, without naming them to us) as "WACKO" (making air-quote gestures with both hands). The "WACKO" comment and gesture became a true Bonnie Trademark. :)

Bonnie makes the fourth or fifth CSS member to die in the past year (I've lost track) -- you'd think God hated us or something...


Goodbye, Bonnie. We're going to miss you more than I can possibly say.

And Debbie... I can't begin to imagine what you're going through... but Angela and I will be there for you, and help out in any way we can...

Current Emotional State: sad sad

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amaebi From: amaebi Date: January 7th, 2008 10:57 pm (UTC) (Link)
She sounds and looks wonderful. I am so sorry.

(And I'm hoping that your secular society's evangelism* is successful, given the unfortunate mortality stats. :( )

(*Yep, that word choice is deliberate and amuses me inordinately.)
unbeliever64 From: unbeliever64 Date: January 7th, 2008 11:52 pm (UTC) (Link)
Evangelize is the right word. :)

(Though we don't go door-to-door, we *DO* promote our ideas as best we can to the community, and try to attract new members.)

And actually, we *HAVE* picked up more than our usual share of new members lately. But that turnover rate still sucks. Especially given that our Pres has recently developed an apparently undiagnosable ailment that leaves him permanently short of breath... :(

Bonnie is the most... out-of-the-blue significant death I've experienced. (Maybe my cousin Billie, who died in a car accident when I was 12 or so, was close -- but I barely knew him.)

I'm still literally stunned. Every hour or so, I'm reliving the realization. "Bonnie's DEAD? No more Bonnie? That can't be right..." :(
amaebi From: amaebi Date: January 8th, 2008 04:24 am (UTC) (Link)
Ah. Well, your experience may be different from mine, and from most of the people I know, but-- I haven't found that death means a cessation in relationship with someone loved. It means a change-- but I've found that their voices continue within me, and not just as memories.

(As it happens, I found this out after my father died when I was fifteen-- and nothing I'd ever heard or read led me to expect it.)
cari_rose From: cari_rose Date: January 8th, 2008 12:08 am (UTC) (Link)

I am so sorry for your loss.
I hope everyone involved pulls through as best they can.

iwannabeaudra From: iwannabeaudra Date: January 8th, 2008 12:49 am (UTC) (Link)

Well, crap.

I'm so sorry to hear this, Reed. Thinking good thoughts for you, Angela, and the Jaron family. :(
compostwormbin From: compostwormbin Date: January 9th, 2008 02:06 am (UTC) (Link)

Oh, she looks so incredibly young. All the worse, as if losing a good friend isn't awful enough. I'm so sorry.
From: dwight_everhart Date: January 9th, 2008 10:32 pm (UTC) (Link)
I'm so sorry, Reed. Bonnie looked like such a sweet person. I wish I had met her. My heart goes out to you, Angela, and Debbie.
From: (Anonymous) Date: July 19th, 2008 09:43 pm (UTC) (Link)


Bonnie was my cousin. I, sadly, didn't really know her. I was devastated when I found out about her death.
From: (Anonymous) Date: April 22nd, 2010 01:54 am (UTC) (Link)

High School Friends

A friend was recently looking for Bonnie for her 20th High School reunion....we are all saddened to learn of her passing. Bonnie did indeed have a wicked sense of humor...I am sure she will be missed greatly.
From: (Anonymous) Date: September 1st, 2010 04:30 pm (UTC) (Link)

Goodbye, Bonnie

I was Bonnie's friend during the early years of my life when I lived near Old Washington, Ohio. She's really the only person I remember all too well (I guess I considered my "girlfriend" back in those days, with all the innocence that term implies at that tender age), so I decided to go on a search for her to see how she was doing. Unfortunately, my searh led me here; I am saddened by the loss of the friend who provided me with so many dear memories from my youth. However, I am happy to know that she had so loving, caring people around her and that she found a loving partner to share her life with.
From: (Anonymous) Date: September 29th, 2014 04:06 pm (UTC) (Link)


I was a classmate with Bonnie from grade school to high school and was in the band with her. Like other classmates from the class of 1990, I was trying to find friends for our reunion. I am sad to hear of her passing, but happy that she was around caring and loving friends. Debbie, I am sorry for your loss.
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